Can a Talk Show Impact Culture?

I think that absolutely these talk shows have an impact on our culture. Look at the time of day they are on, most being on between the 10:00am to 4:00pm time slot. Many of these shows are watched by housewives, and individuals who stay at home and work. These shows do have an argumentative tone, two individuals are having relationship problems, so they search for help from a talk show host who may or may not help them through their situation. Though I also find that many people that watch these shows do so to make their own lives seem as if it is less dysfunctional then they would like to believe.

            There is a major issue I have with how these talk shows teach us how to deal with conflict. When you watch these shows, you usually hear a lot about the story, the two sides, and what the host believes is the correct course of action. The thing is we don’t get to see how it works out. These hosts don’t teach us how to deal with our issues, teach us how to communicate effectively, teach us how to calm a hostile audience, even if that is our significant other. They just teach us a tiny portion of what may or may not be good for building a relationship.

            What does this mean for the public? Those who spend much of their daily time listening or watching these shows as they clean their houses, check their stocks, or do whatever is it they do during the day? I believe that these shows are a detriment. Not only because the show only shows a tiny fraction of the work needed to come out of a conflict in the first place, but we fail to see that the individuals chosen for the show were hand picked. These are extreme cases of a situation, not the norm. Then when we hear the responses of the hosts, we are hearing a response to a situation that would be on the extreme end of its spectrum.

            There is one exception, and that in my opinion is Dr. Phil. I am not saying I agree with all of his methods, but he actually talks to people about the little things they can do in their lives to bolster communication in your relationships. Though even this program can have a detrimental impact because it might make someone think they are like a mini walking psychologist, thinking they know all of the social intricacies that go along in a conversation. They haven’t gone through the schooling involved and they are definitely not an expert.

            These examples are the ones I believe affect our society the most. Individuals that accept the stories portrayed on these shows as the norm are the ones who are negatively impacted by these shows. The other issue is that these shows give people only a partial glimpse of a situation and resolution, without the details one needs to fully understand the topic at hand. They don’t actually help people communicate better, just give then little tiny pieces, spread out over so many areas that one cannot actually piece them all together. Because of this I believe these shows impact our culture in a mixed way, some do better at being a positive influence than others.

Racial Insults in the Media

            Not only are we all exposed to racial and ethnic insults all the time, we become so used to hearing them that we begin to grow accustomed to them. Whether it is in the movies, music, or television I believe that we are constantly exposed to stereotypes that some members of a certain race or ethnicity would find absolutely appalling.

            First, I would like to look at music. If there is any form of media that seems to absolutely be flooded with racial undertones I believe that it is the music industry. We all know why, it all has to do with the famous “N” word. Many arguments have arisen because of it. Why is it ok for an African American to say it but not for a Caucasian? Does the omission of a single letter really matter? Is the use of this word in daily life really a way of trying to reduce the power of the word and change its meaning? I have no clue how life is as an African American growing up, but to me it seems as if I would find much of music nowadays fairly disrespectful to my race as a whole.

            Next we come to Movies. Movies portray many different things, and explore many situations and issues in our world. Of course racism, sexism, and ethnic stereotypes abound in the movies, they always have. Early westerns, one of the most successful genres of movies in the early film industry, centered their whole existence on Cowboys vs. Indians. Of course, these movies were full of images of Indians hooting and hollering, doing strange ritualistic dances around a fire, drinking the blood of animals, and practicing in all sorts of actions that would have been deemed taboo by western society. We all know that there were practices by Native Americans that may seem shocking to some, but many tribes just centered their existence on living off the land. They weren’t a bunch of blood crazed animals looking to kill the next white man that came around.

            Books and television I find hard to classify. Sure there are books that contain racial insults, and we can even find shows that do the same, but I rarely watch TV enough to run into these shows. I watch TV mainly to watch movies or the Science Channel. Books contain the ideas of one author, who can easily be targeted for his words, and as such I believe that authors are much more careful with their words, and it would definitely be hard to find a publisher to print a manuscript that was full of racial insults.

            All of these add to the growth of racial prejudice because of the huge audience these forms of communication reach. It reaches people of little education and higher education, young and old, male and female. Some of these people are easily brought in to the stereotypes and insults portrayed on these mediums, and after being bombarded with these issues become accepting of them. This in itself leads to the spread of these insults, as some people are too willing to accept information without questioning it.

How we differ.........

            There are many differences in the way that men and women communicate non-verbally. Many differences come through in the tone of voice and touch. Men and women both share many of the same facial expressions, though the way in which we use them can be very different.

            I will begin by first exploring how men and women use the tone of their voice to communicate, pointing out a key difference. When a man and a woman have a discussion, there are times when a male will subconsciously change the pitch of his voice in order to seem more masculine. This is especially true of men who are seeking mates, the deeper voice in this case being to attract the opposite sex. Females on the other hand lower their voice. They speak in softer tones once again to seem more attractive to the opposite gender. This is not only true when they are seeking mates, but in general. When females are actively listening, they tend to use softer tones and speak in a softer manner then men. It is not only because their voices are softer but that the softer voice tells the speaker that they are listening.

            Now that we have discussed how men tend to speak in deeper, resonant tones, and woman speak in higher, softer tones, we can now discuss how men and women use touch when they talk. Men have a very difficult time touching other males. It’s just a fact. I am not saying that there are not some males who are not open to touching others, but that men in general seem to keep physical contact with each other to a minimum. I find that females are much more open when it comes to other females touching them. For instance, how often do you see two unrelated males hugging each other? My guess is not very often, but actually very rarely. On the other hand, how often do you see two women hug each other? I think it is much more common. Take for instance southern males, who would probably rather be caught dead then hug another male, and this even goes for fathers and sons.

            Suffice it to say, this does not mean we are discussing different languages. It’s just that men and women use different means of conveying the same nonverbal messages. While men might lower their voice and extend the length of what they say in astonishment “Noooo Waaay” a female might say in a higher tone and faster “No Way!” The tones help express their astonishment, excitement, or surprise, men and woman just use different tones. We grow up with it, and we learn how to decipher these codes by inspecting discussions from the time we are born until now.

            It is very important to note that we do learn these differences as we grow. Our parents and friends as we go through life will be the educational basis of learning these different habits by different genders. We learn our nonverbal speech from the ones who are closest to us. We learn their patterns and tone, emulating it as we grow older, discarding those which we dislike and fully integrating others into our speech. We all learn differing nonverbal habits, but we are not speaking different languages.

Broad Spectrum Communication

Mrs. Akin,

I completely agree with your assessment “a speaker attempts to code ideas, feelings, ideas, and images with words. Those words are transferred to the listener who then matches them with their own experiences.” In my life in particular, there are many times I can pinpoint this trait of conversation, and I can tell you, when the listener deconstructs the code I expressed, it is often not exactly the idea I meant to convey.

There are many failures to our vocabulary, most of those errors due to the fact that many people have different meanings for words. I might say “Great!” but how do you know I mean “Great!” or if I am being sarcastic when I say “Great!” like when you find out you just got fired. My tone tells the story. You can tell which version of the word I am using through my tone and emotion when I say the word, without those tones my true intentions would be lost.

Now what if I am in the middle of a conversation and say “Great!” If you were talking about something good, you would probably side with the good translation, but if you were angry, you would have sided with the sarcastic one. But what if I meant the other? If you were talking about something bad, and I said “Great!” all happy and jubilant, wouldn’t you automatically assume I was happy about whatever bad thing happened to you? I know if that was the position I was in, I would be extremely angry.

When it comes to failures in communication, much of the failures in the code are not a failure of words, but a failure in how those words are expressed. Our tones can just as easily be misinterpreted as our words. Our sarcasm misinterpreted as a real statement of our feelings. When we study the code of speech, we must also study the code of body language and tone. You cannot discuss one without the other, as the meaning of our words is externally decoded not only in the words we choose, but also the way in which we say it.

I find the most common place for this kind of misunderstanding to be when members of the opposite sex communicate. If you tell a story, and the other party does not make eye contact, we feel ignored. This causes the speaker to get aggravated and then maybe the two parties become hostile towards each other. This is not a code of words that was spoken, but a silent code of body language. Even if the person not making eye contact was listening intently, paying attention to every word, we still feel as if we are being ignored.

When we try to cross the communication gap you need to be aware of three key factors. First, the words you speak have different meanings to every individual; they carry a different weight for each person you talk to. Second, the tone in which you speak will say almost as much as your words. If you talk in a sad manner, the listener more than likely respond in the same fashion, or with some semblance of sympathy. Lastly, the body language, hand gestures, and physical parts of a conversation can speak volumes about what you are trying to convey, I can tell when my daughter is excited just by seeing her jump up and down, squealing, and the big smile on her face. No words are spoken, but I know exactly what she is thinking.

I believe you oversimplify the idea of crossing the communication gap, but share some great insights to the weight of words, and how they are interpreted and delivered from speaker to listener. I just feel as if you oversimplify the means of delivery, remember that delivery is the key to understanding, if the delivery service messes up, the listener will receive a broken package. Always understand the importance of delivery and the nonverbal communication that can say just as much, if not more than the actual words themselves.